Talking to Children About Military Service

Parents and guardians are tasked with discussing many difficult subjects with their children. The youngest members of our families can have the hardest time coping with the realities of having a loved one away from home. When that loved one is serving in a branch of the US armed services, the conversations become even harder.

As much as parents and older siblings wish to shield children from the complex realities of war, a great deal of fear and anxiety can result from not knowing the particulars of the circumstances they are caught in. Picture and story books are a great tool to help children understand that they are not alone. These stories can also lead to other discussions about the value of loyalty, patriotism, and service.

A Brief Reading List

There are many great books for children about military deployment and life at home while a loved one is serving far away. These are a few of the books that can be added to your child’s library:

• Countdown ‘til Daddy Comes Home (by Kristin Ayyar)
• American Hero Books: My Mommy is a Marine (by Alia Reese)
• American Hero Books: My Daddy is a Marine (by Alia Reese)
• My Daddy’s Deployment: An Activity Book (by Julie LaBelle)
• The Wishing Tree (by Mary Redman)
• Heroes! Activities for Kids Dealing with Deployment (by Susan B. Weaver)
• Over There (by Dorinda Silver Williams)
• Home Again (by Dorinda Silver Williams)

These and other books on the subject of deployment and homecoming can be found online, in bookstores, and at your local library. If you cannot locate a book you want, ask a sales associate to order a copy for you. A bookseller may be able to connect you with a number of other helpful books, too.

Making Holidays Extra Special

Holidays can be especially challenging for children with a family member far from home. Parents can help make these important moments easier for children by making time spent together a priority. Reassuring children of the support and love of family members, whether they are present for a celebration or not, can help them feel more positive about these events.

Many Ways to Communicate

Writing letters and drawing pictures are just two of the ways that kids can communicate with family members far from home. Part of your family’s observation of holidays can include writing a letter to your deployed relative. This way, everyone can participate in the holiday even if they are not present. Collect all the letters and pictures together for mailing. If you are not able to send the items right away, put them in a special place so your service member loved one can open them upon their return.

Scrapbooks and journals are two great ways that kids can create an ongoing dialogue with their distant relative. These are added to a little bit at a time, whenever the child wishes to tell their family member something important. Once everyone is reunited the scrapbook can be given as a gift.

Children struggle in unique ways with the implications of a deployed family member. Encouraging conversation and communication will help them cope with this complicated situation and can make everyone grow closer together.

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